Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Give Peace A Chance

The other day I was walking down Hawthorne when a hipster (scientifically known as hipsticus snoberai) approaching me on the sidewalk, almost got hit by a car. The car was trying to pull out onto Hawthorne and didn't see said hipster crossing the street. He (the hipster) placed his hand on the car and exclaimed,

"Why don't you watch where you are going?!"

Which makes sense, because the man in the car was in fact not watching where he was going.

Normally in these situations, the driver would acknowledge that he/she wasn't paying attention and would make some sort of passing apology. This was not one of these situations.

Instead the driver's retort was,

"Why don't I come out of here and kick your ass!"

Maybe he had not had his coffee yet, or hates hipsters, or enjoys fights, or was just not having a good day, but I would hope that this isn't something he normally does.

If it were me, and I was the hipster, I would have laughed and walked away. Most likely to a slew of taunts such as the classic, "Oh yeah! Go ahead and walk away!" Which for one reason or another must make the person feel he/she is actually making that person walk away. But alas, this hipster had spunk, he had hutzpah, he was going to have the last laugh!

"Sure you will buddy! Just keep on driving your SUV!"

Ohhhh burn! Cause as you may know, no self-proclaimed hipster would be caught dead in a car that doesn't have at least 100k miles on it, 2 hubcaps, and either an interior or exterior that hasn't been modified to look "retro".

This guy had style, but he was out of his league as the frat-boy car-jockey gave what was (to me at least) a difinitive argument ender,

"I will get out of this car and break your fucking neck!"

I believe this is called assault, or at least verbal intention OF assault. This was so ridiculous that I could not help but laugh. Fortunately I was out of sight by now and could not be identified by the lunatic in the car. The hipster, for whatever reason, decided to continue with this little number,

"That's real great man. Setting a great example for your kids in the back!"

Point hipster. The two juggernauts of idiocy continue to battle it out, but the suave local seemed to have an edge....seemed.

Car-jockey, "I only got one kid in the back and he would love to see me fuck you up!"

And the game goes to the car-jockey. A shocking ending to what was an epic battle of stupidity. Let's give peace a chance....and watch where the fuck we're going.

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