In A Rut

Well friends, I still need a job. It's been a year since I've had real work, which sounds weird, but I need one desperately now. I'm not quite going for broke here, but it's getting to that point. So I decided that I should look back on this past year and see what kind of decisions I made and if I would've maybe done something else, something more.

After I was laid off, I went two routes. First I started looking jobs that were part-time, full-time, any-time that could pay me something. Then I looked for some creative work to do for free and bought myself a camera and a decent editing suite to practice on. That was one of the best choices I've made. After meeting with my now good friend Jaime, I became a cameraman for Pirate Satellite TV and worked on tons of shoots. Again, really good choice. I got so much experience out of it and eventually became an Executive Producer organizing and running the operation. Hard times only got harder and it seemed our dream for getting the show picked up by some advertisers wouldn't happen. Although I will help out in any way that I can, I needed to find something to work on, something that I could make some money and gain some experience at the same time.

Enter the "Lewis and Clark Were Here" project. In October, my now fiance and I decided to embark on this journey that would take us across the country and provide a compelling (and marketable) adventure for people all across the US. For 6 months we planned out every detail and when it came time for the funding and sponsors it looks like we could maybe make it, but there many of our loved ones that were worried and had reasonable arguments that we shouldn't go on with our project. Sadly, we had to make the decision to cancel (or possibly postpone) our great walk across the country and now we are left with the question of "where do we go from here?"

That is the question for many Americans today, "where do we go from here?" Many people state that your 'job' does not define you as a person, and while that may be true it does give someone a purpose. Not having a defined 'purpose' in life can be devastating to a person's psyche as I'm learning over the year that I have been more or less unemployed. I do not consider myself to have been unemployed for a year, just lacking in monetary compensation. But when you don't have a solid schedule everyday and are putting together projects that yield you experience but no revenue, it becomes harder and harder to wake up, wash your face, and go out into the world.

I'm sorry if this post seems depressing, but I'm grasping at straws. Everyone everywhere is saying, "everything is going to be alright" and "you'll get a job eventually", but what if it doesn't. There are people out there who don't have jobs and haven't for quite some time. There are situations that don't get better. Believe me, I am more of an optimist than most people you will have met but there is a breaking point. My dad tells me almost every time I talk to him that "man, I really admire your spirit. I couldn't do that." Maybe that's because he has a job, and always had one.

Forgive me for venting.

I have taken more drastic steps now and will continue to take greater steps to get a job. My message to all those who are unemployed out there and looking for work:

Do what you can to stay sane without hurting yourself. Talk it out with as many people as you can and try your best to stay focused on your goals. And above all else don't give up. If you keep going, if you keep trying, your persistence will pay off.

I have to be close now, because I've been trying a while. So hurry up and get here job cause dammit I'm ready to work!!!

The Future is NOW!

It's been too long my friends, but as many of you know I've been busy. What with the wedding to plan for and our walking trek to St. Louis coming up, my thoughts were elsewhere. That and nothing really peaked my interest that wasn't related to either Lewis and Clark or wedding stuff, but no more!! Here is the coolest thing I've seen in months.




You can take a minute to watch that movie if you'd like (I would suggest it), and I'll wait.

.....WASN'T THAT FREAKING BADASS!?!! I should say that my old roommate Mike and I had that idea a decade ago which we, in turn, got from playing the original Metal Gear Solid. The game, for those of you who haven't played it, was lightyears ahead of anything else in either film or gaming, showing a level of interactivity that I believe has yet to be matched. For example, in one particular boss fight during the game (Psycho Mantis) the enemy is psychic and can read your thoughts. He proves this by reading the memory card in your Playstation, and if you've played any games by Konami (the developers) then he will tell you something like, "I see you like Castlevania!" Creepy and way cool. Then he shows his telekenetic powers by using the 'shock' function on the controller that vibrates by telling you to put the control on the ground and he will make it move. He sends a message to the controller to start vibrating which makes it move....way, way, way to cool. Finally since he can read your thoughts he knows where you will shoot and you are unable to damage him ...unless you switch your controller from controller port 1 to port 2! This degree of innovation in gaming is beyond anything that I've seen even today and more game/film companies should take a page out of Kojima's book.

This film apparently did. I applaude them for breaking boundaries and making film more immersive, but I did have a problem with this approach. In a horror film the point is to get scared. It gives people a rush, like a roller coaster or bungie jumping, of adrenaline that some people enjoy. In order for a horror movie to do that they need to create a level of suspense that heightens the viewers level of paranoia to get the holy grail that is the "scream". With the phone call, you break down what in theater is called the "fourth wall" and the illusion of the film is gone. In an attempt to further immerse people into the story and suspense they are actually breaking it down in a lot of ways. Now I could be wrong about this and it may make it even more suspenseful, but I have to say that if I had the phone and was talking to this chick on the screen I would try and get her to do the dumbest things just for kicks and laugh about it while I was doing it.

One thing is for sure, this is a really awesome idea and it will make boatloads of cash! How many times would you go see a movie that could be different every time? How many times would you go see it to try and be the person she called? The answer, a lot....a whole lot.